Another source of goose bumps was a 1973 ‘Cuda 340 I once owned. Not so much the car – which packed a mild 1969 vintage 340, a 727 and 3.23 Sure Grip – but the way the lug nuts on the left rear wheel were only finger tight when I took delivery. At first, nothing seemed out of the ordinary as I drove the car around to all my bud’s places to show it off. The bright red paint and super clean rust-free Virginia body captured their attention. But I remember hearing this weird clunking noise at low speeds. Up at 100-mph, there was no problem. It was only when I was showing off the clean trim rings on the 5-spoke 14x6 Road Wheels that I noticed the lug nut holes were elongated and the chrome lug nuts were loose! Man, I was pissed. Not that I was hauling ass at 100-plus earlier that day and would have been in deep shit if the wheel left the car, but because the rim was destroyed and I had to substitute a plain 14-inch steel wheel I snagged from my Volare station wagon. Oh, what could have been.
And finally, there’s the memory of another Barracuda to keep us amused. This one was a 1970 Barracuda 318 (G code) that had been converted into a loosely interpreted ‘Cuda 383 clone. It had a Shaker hood. Well, actually somebody cut a hole in the stock Barracuda flat hood and then bolted a real Shaker ring to it. But unlike a real Shaker hood, there was no beveled flange to let the ring sit down flush with the hood skin like the Plymouth stylists intended. This one sat above the skin and always looked like a goofy add-on to my eye – because it was! The shaker bubble and base assembly were the real deal but the inner workings had been stripped out. As for the engine, it was a warmed over 1971-vintage 383 with headers, an Edelbrock intake and a 750 Holley vacuum secondary. Now here’s the rub. That 383 had a cast crank but was coupled to a neutral-balance B&M torque converter via a standard four-ear Chrysler flex plate.
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I didn’t know this going in and none of it seemed to be a problem - except for a mild vibration at cruising speeds. I decided to live with in those first few days of ownership. But one night, about a week into owning the car, I heard this weird “clang” as I cruised Route 67 looking for some traction action. It was a single noise, like somebody striking a bell. I blipped the throttle, everything seemed normal and I kept motoring along. Then an hour later there was another clang. Just like the first, except now there was a steady vibration under the car that ceased if I killed the ignition while rolling. I pulled over and got under the thing for a look. My eyes bugged out t the sight of not one, but two fractured ears on the flex plate. The match up of the externally balanced cast crank and neutral-balance transmission parts in this cobbled ‘Cuda was not a happy one. Throw in the possibility of case-to-block misalignment and I had a flex plate eating machine.
What to do…without anything resembling a AAA card or enough cash to pay for a tow, I figured my best bet would be to gently nurse it home, a distance of about 15 miles. I got bout ½ mile from my driveway when I heard a third “clang” then a “whtttttripppp”. These lovely noises – and the fact that stabbing the pedal increased engine speed – but didn’t move the wheels - signaled that the third ear of the flex plate had sheared. This left the fourth and final ear to transfer power from the crankshaft to the torque converter – which it did – for about 2 seconds. The resulting pretzel shaped flex plate hung on my garage wall for a while before I tossed it in the trash in a vain bid to squash the ugly memory of how the car sat for months before I got it fixed.
Actually, I never did effect a proper repair. Oh sure, I swapped in another flex plate, which lasted a few days before doing the same thing. There was also a massive ATF leak. Yep, I dropped the 727 again and replaced the flex plate and seal – still leaking. Then I figured the front pump bushing was worn out and making the torque converter wobble. It was then that I spotted the massive amount of wear focused on the lower half of the bushing while the upper half was normal. This was a clear sign that the crankshaft and transmission input shaft were not correctly aligned. The culprit here is typically production tolerance stack up and the only solution is to install offset dowel pins between block and transmission case. It was all too much for me and I sold the car. Just thinking about this stuff makes me soooo tired! But every caper adds hard won knowledge. At least that’s what I keep telling myself.
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